TeawithTiffany

You are here: Home / Faith / My Unbelief

My Unbelief

By

Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
Psalm 20:7 (NIV)

Confession: I have a trust issue. I don’t completely trust God with everything in my life. I’m better at trusting God with YOUR LIFE.

When I get real before the LORD, I admit my unbelief. I hate the reality of my stubborn heart sometimes. Even after all I’ve gleaned from God’s Word, even after I’ve heard His sweet whisper over and over, even after the body of Christ has encouraged me time and time again, I’m still prone to unbelief. What’s up with that?

Unbelief grabs my trust and puts it in a choke-hold, and I won’t do hard things for God. Even when He asks nicely. Like write a book. Hmm, God isn’t letting me off the hook here after almost three years. He’s serious and I’m a modern-day doubting Thomas. Instead of going forward with perfect trust, I sit back and give excuses:

*I’m the least qualified.
*I’m too simple minded.
*I have attention issues. I often don’t finish what I start.
*I often forget what God has taught me, so how can I possibly help another?
*What if the words I write fall short?
*My story isn’t all that special or dramatic.
*What if people can’t finish the book?
*What if my chapters are self absorbed?
*What if I’m not deep enough? What if I’m too deep?
*What if I’m theologically incorrect?
*What if no one ever publishes it? Is this between You and me, LORD?God, why me? Isn’t there someone more put together, more polished? What if I’m secretly trying to steal Your glory, God? Please no, I can’t go there…

Yes, I see the flaws in my excuses above, but that doesn’t change my heart. Funny thing is I can offer faith filled advice to others when it comes to trusting God. I encourage them to step out in faith and watch God show up, offering words like, “Whoever God calls, He equips.” Wouldn’t it be nice if I would believe my own advice? Ha.

I’m not sure why I’m writing this here today. This is something I’d normally save for my handy dandy notebook. Maybe someone out there understands my battle for complete trust. Maybe like me, you’re tired of unbelief. Maybe like me, trusting God for everyone else, but not for yourself.

If so, I think it’s time we dump our unbelief once and for all, and latch onto trusting God with everything we have: a mustard size seed of faith.

After all, God is trustworthy.
God is trustworthy.
God is trustworthy.
Amen?

Today, let us cry out like the father in Mark 9:24, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

(pic taken in Bozeman, MT last week)

Comments

  1. Trust. Always the bottom line, isn't it? And if God is trustworthy then when He says I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength, I am more than a conqueror, I have overcome the world by believing in Jesus… If He's trustworthy, then I can believe what He says about me and trust His faithfulness.

    Thanks Tiffany. I think we're on the same page today! My post is about Jesus in the Garden. You might like it. 🙂

  2. Yes Tiffany I can relate. I think we all can. Most of our sin can be boiled down to lack of trust. When I read your post it reminded me of Moses. Maybe that can help you with your writing.

  3. You mean that someone, "Me"…the thing is I do really well with trust until something reeeeeaaaallllly BIG happens…and then there I go..doubting Thomas in the flesh! Only to wallow around and eventually crawl back to the feet of Jesus! I am in the midst of a great "biggie" right now that is totally beyond my control. It is a situation caused by a family member that could and will likely cause great damage to many lives. It is a 40 year old situation that has just come to light. Now, I am trusting with each breath I take…but I gotta tell you…some "moments"…yes, I said moment cause this is a moment to moment trust…it is difficult. Yes, my dear….GOD brought this post out of the notebook and into the blog world JUST FOR ME!
    THANK YOU for listening to HIS still small voice!
    Hugs,
    andrea

  4. Hi Tiffany,

    I've only been reading your blog for a few months but in that time, I've found your writing to be honest, sincere and compassionate.

    Trust, doubt and self-doubt are the three-sided coin in our lives as followers of Christ.

    If you want to write that book, start writing it Sister! Set aside time each day to write; even if it's only a sentence. A writer writes Tiffany; there isn't an option to it. Join a writers group in your area.

    Don't beat yourself up about writing.

    Be blessed and thanks for your honesty.

    MTJ

  5. GOD HAS AN OBSESSION to be TRUSTED!
    Even above worship – He wants to be trusted!

    It's the hardest part for each of us to 'get'!

    And – in order for us to learn to trust Him – He usually [actually always] takes us out on a limb [with Him] and asks something of us that we are totally incapable of doing on our own – without putting complete TRUST in Who HE is – and not our situation or circumstances. Once out on that limb – He will not fail us! That's where the TRUST comes in.

    Just be sure that the limb is the place He's taking you to – then rest there even if the limb begins to bend from the weight. It won't snap – He has His Hand under it!

    He's got it!

    This is an important post because our TRUST doesn't come easily to any of us – it comes little by little as we release more and more of ourselves into His Hands.

    Praying with you and for you,
    Stephanie

  7. Tiffany:

    I could have written this post. I struggle with doubt, unbelief, thankfulness (wrote about the latter on my blog today).

    Know that you are not alone in this. I often think of the scripture "I do believe, help my unbelief."

    Blessings,
    Joan

  8. Thank you all for your comments and encouragement. I'm doing better right now because I realize I will "trust God" to lead me to write when I supposed to write. And if He doesn't, it's not time yet. I can rest and no longer beat myself up for my lack…

    God is for me. His love covers me.

    You too, of course.

  9. Tiffany: I think we all could have written this post. Sometimes it is even a relief when someone else (like you) writes what we feel! Until we get to the other side we see "in a glass darkly" but we will see, and that is enough for God to work with. Go write that book! Lori

  10. Trust is so hard sometimes. I often find I always feel relieved after giving in to the trust – it's just the doing that is hard.

  11. I feel this way, too. I think it is natural. We walk by sight naturally and have to learn to walk by faith. That is a life process. M Scott Peck calls that the "stripping away" of the concerns for this life to prepare ourselves for the final transition – leaving this life for the next. Good post.

    Glad your Montana trip went well. My brother lives in Bozeman. A beautiful town!

  12. I had to smile at your first paragraph…you were so on the mark…

    The Lord has brought to my remembrance so many times things I have told others about standing strong in their faith…

    I believe He has us edify each other for that very reason…so we can learn to "practice what we preach"…

    This was a fantastic post, Tiffany!

  13. your honesty is refreshing….trust has been a huge issue for me…mostly trusting people but maybe that's part of not fully trusting God too.

  14. Tiffany, I so understand where you're coming from. It's easy to write and tell others how to trust in God, much harder to apply to our own lives.

    God has been nudging and prodding me to believe that He will supply all my needs. My goodness, that one digs down deep into so many aspects of life, but everything comes back to fully trusting Him.

    Praying for you, sweet one!

  15. thou wilt keep him in perfect peace,whose mind his stayed on thee;because he trusted in thee(isaiah 26;3-4)pr3;5 and ps37;5

  16. Gosh…for a minute I thought I had written this post! 🙂 I guess we're not alone, are we!